Fred Gransville

CIA's Favorite Truth-Diversion Network: Take a Guess?

Spoiler alert: Some of this is satire.

Ah, 2025. It was the year when cable news giants learned the art of turning every small political faux pas into a huge existential disaster and ignoring the real tribulations of the commoner. The time when the 'Verbal Bureaucrats' moved from conveying pertinent information to entertaining the masses with a mix of melodrama, speculative ideologies, and the occasional pop culture reference. Step right up to the cable news circus, where stakes are low, rewards plentiful, and truth the first casualty. Fear sells ad space-Fox: Where Reality Takes a Backseat to Ratings.

CNN (Cattle News Network): The Machine That Cries False Alarms

In 2025, CNN is that friend who texted you ‘We need to talk’ in a way that guaranteed you’ll waste an entire hour talking about nothing more than the weather. CNN has mastered the ability to create urgency and every of its reports seems to be ‘breaking news’. For instance, the Great Butter Crisis of 2025 or the earth-shattering story of a lawmaker who was once seen in the public with mismatched socks. CNN ensures to give it wall-to-wall coverage whether the viewer is interested or not. CNN: Turning Panic Into Profits Since 1980.

Anderson Cooper – The Argent Fox of Despair
Anderson Cooper is alive and well, albeit a little more melodramatic than ever. In 2025, he's taken his disaster reporting to new heights. He now broadcasts from a state-of-the-art, hurricane-proof studio hovering above disaster zones. Though Anderson's hair remains perfectly coiffed, his journalistic impartiality has yielded to melodramatic diatribes on the 'demise of democracy as we know it.' His greatest report? A 45-minute dissertation on the potential for AI-generated memes to destroy the global economy. Edge-of-your-seat material, I swear. CNN: Breaking News, Broken Truths.

Abbey Phillips - CNN's Pompous Pundit

Phillips is a virtuoso at turning trivia into matters of existential crises. Reporting for the Cattle News Network, she weaves over-the-top narratives, exaggerating small political blunders into occurrences of such profound importance that the end of civilization is nigh. Each segment is a calculated din of alarm, in which substance is lost beneath layers of emotional hyperbole and platitudes.

Her journalism acumen? A ruthless talent for trumpeting the unimportant, sensationalizing every run-of-the-mill breakthrough into an epic of disaster. If CNN is a circus, Abbey is the harlequin-entertaining an audience more in the mood for hysteria than enlightenment. Ignore facts-fear is more profitable, and Abbey's strength is making crisis appear on the horizon even when there's nothing. Her best story by far, Joe Biden’s brain is going to explode at any second.

Abbey Phillips and John King spent 20-30 minutes axing Joe Biden’s run on the 2024 election, the two of them preemptively chose Harris as the “Contender” for 2024. Two people, by themselves, decided Harris was “our man.” CNN rewarded her with her own show. She never really told us empirically that Joe has Alzheimer’s, Disease, she just said it in 20-different ways, in true woman emotional blackmail, passive-aggressive hatched-job.

Jake Tapper – The Personification of Interruption
Jake Tapper is a master of the interrogational ambush, even if it requires cutting off his guest’s mid-revelation so that he can pose the question, 'But what about the children?' In 2025, he's taken his 'fearless journalist' routine to new levels, debuting a segment named 'Tapper's Tribunal,' in which he grills politicians on issues from policy wonkery to their preferred pizza varieties. 

Dana Bash – Queen of the Blindingly Obvious
Dana Bash continues to pose those hard questions, such as 'How do you view political polarization?' and 'Do you acknowledge the national divide?' Her interviews are art masterpieces at regurgitating the painfully obvious, with guests nodding their heads as if they unraveled the mysteries of cold fusion. In 2025, she did a new show, 'Bash Basics,' in which she pontificated complicated political events through the use of marionettes..

MSNBC (Master Scientologist National Click Bait): The Ivory Tower of Zionist Liberal Despair (and Platitudes)

MSNBC is still the network of choice for anyone who wants to feel morally superior when viewing visual programming. In the year 2025, the network has doubled down on its investment in liberal outrage, with every telecast including at least one investigative expose on the impending collapse of civilization-caused exclusively by Republican policies. MSNBC: Making the 'Truth' More Slippery Than a Snake. MSNBC is a Zionist Cult rife with fake Liberalism.

Rachel Maddow: The Conspiracy Neighbor

The reality television host Rachel Maddow still lives, as does her dry legacy. It appears that no one has made strange yet of Maddow’s infamous overreaching and strange interconnections with gossips from years ago. In 2025, she took her conspiracies heavy and reached a new diameter with a 12-part television show on narrating the Butter Cartel and government manipulation. Her monologues now exceed ninety minutes and watching them, one cannot help but to imagine that her litany had somehow strayed into a college lecture. But there’s no arguing that, her enthusiasm for mundane antics is catchy.

Lawrence O'Donnell – The Monarch of Encyclopedism (Except in Knowing When to Stop)

Lawrence O’Donnell claims to still be the unquestionable monarch of the monologue, everything from tax laws to the history of paperclips can be a witty twenty-minute diatribe. In 2025, he incorporated his new segment ‘O’Donnell’s Journey’ where, much like how the name suggests, less known places of American political history come to life. Sighs and sketching out candlesticks can leave a lecture feeling somewhat similar to a C-SPAN hearing, turn on some dramatics to step it up a notch.

Ari Melber – The Avant-Garde Commentator of News
Ari Melber is still attempting to be the most culturally au courant individual in the room, spitting rap lyrics and pop culture references like they're last season's news. In 2025, he's brought his "cool" quotient to new levels with the premiere of a show titled "The Pulse: Jurisprudence Edition," where he breaks down Supreme Court rulings through the use of metaphors from reality television.

The experience is as confounding as it is complex, but at least he loves his work.

Fox (Faux Oxen) News: The Network That Has Never Met a Conspiracy It Did Not Hug

Fox News in 2025 is a fever dream you can't wake up from. The network has completely embraced its status as the premier trafficker of outrage, and every show has at least one segment on how the liberals are after your guns, your milk, and your freedom. Headlines Brought to You by the CIA.

Tucker Carlson – Fox's Mercurial Sage
Tucker Carlson plodded along, more detached than ever. In 2025, he's taken his conspiracy theories to dizzying new heights, labeling the Great Butter Shortage a multifaceted scheme by the shadow government to repress the audience. His program, "Tucker's Revelations," features a revolving panel of guests who nod along to his rants on artificial intelligence and extraterrestrial life.

It's like watching a man lose his mind, one monologue at a time.

Sean Hannity – The King of Alarmism
Sean Hannity remains the undisputed king of alarmism, making every story mass hysteria. In 2025, he debuted, "Hannity's Horror Hour," where he propagandizes the public with the threats from electric vehicles to veganism. His guests, are a melange of minor political personalities and random individuals surfed from the comically darker corners of the web, intellectual WWF.

Laura Ingraham – The Empress of Sardonic Wit
Laura Ingraham is handing out her trademark snarky commentary, with an added side of smugness. In 2025, she has taken to new levels of absurdity, including features such as "Ingraham's Jabs," where she taunts liberals for their wardrobe choices and their music. She is like a grade school foe who never matured.

The Extravaganza, the Platitudes, and the Peculiar Priorities

Cable TV news in 2025 remains a pageant of the highest order, with each network performing its scripted part in the ongoing extravaganza. CNN manufactures a sense of urgency, MSNBC lectures to its choir, and Fox News inflames the passions. The "Verbal Bureaucrats" hold sway over the airwaves, offering a blend of melodrama, speculative ideology, and an occasional pop culture reference. It is not news but entertainment-and on the cable television news world, that is the top agenda. Mockingbirds Don't Sing-They Propagandize.

The Ten LGBTQ+ Athletes Who Dwarf America's Problems
In a bizarre twist of irony, the year 2025 had cable television news networks fixating on the ten LGBTQ+ athletes in big-time sports, projecting them on screen as tokens of social progress while overlooking the cost of gas, heating oil and electricity, concerns of the audience. 

Each of the networks did segments on these queer athletes, with CNN airing a never-ending marathon called "Pride on the Field," MSNBC airing documentary series "Breaking Boundaries," and Fox News lamenting the "progressive agenda" invading the sports world. All this as the everyday American grappled with out-of-control inflation, exorbitant healthcare costs, and deteriorating public infrastructure. Freedom of the Press? Or Freedom to Oppress? Meanwhile, the burning and vandalism of some Tesla autos was touted as today’s 9-11.

Canada and Greenland: The New Cable News Sovereigns

In 2025, the cable news network’s mysteriously pushed Canada and Greenland into spotlights overshadowing health, inflation, wildfires,  food costs, insurance costs and the like. CNN had a protracted series on Canada's health care system, MSNBC had a documentary on the receding ice sheets of Greenland, and Fox News provided dire warnings on the "invasion" of Canada Geese. Ordinary Americans were meanwhile left asking themselves why their own nation's issues were being eclipsed in favor of stories about maple syrup and polar animals.

The Truth is Classified

In 2025, cable television news is still an armed PSYOPs debacle, with each network performative its Mockingbird role in the round-the-clock pageant.

CNN creates dire urgency, MSNBC preaches Centrist-Zionist to the Jewish choir, and Fox News fans the flames of contrived moral turpitude. The "Verbal Bureaucrats" continue to dissect the airwaves with minutia, churning out drama, manufactured ideologies, and sporadic pop culture tidbits. It isn't journalism, but it is still time-consuming-and that's cable television news' most ambitious undertaking. So, here's to another year of strange reality! Fox News: Redefining 'Alternative Facts' Daily. All three networks will walk us to our graves with nary a visit to a real protest or real townhall meeting. Why participate in a true democracy when the digital, virtual, AI-driven version placates so well?

Concentration of Media Ownership and Its Implication

The United States of America has a thin layer of giant corporations dominating the media, and as a result, there is a concentration of media ownership. Companies like Comcast, which owns NBCUniversal and MSNBC, News Corporation with its Fox News, and Warner Bros. Discovery, owning CNN, dominate major portions of the media. 

Such concentration of ownership has the impact of stifling diversity of opinion since all outlets, under a single corporate roof, could share identical editorial stands with the consequence being homogenized reporting. Submissions by entities such as the Federal Communications Commission (FCC) show the media ownership progressively shifting to the center in consecutive decades, stirring concern regarding risks of conflict of interest.

The authority of the U.S. government to influence the press has been mostly ignored for decades. The Pentagon, for instance, has employed comment, content and intelligence with news media, at times fronting retired generals and colonels as commentators. 

There are documented events of the Pentagon offering guidance and information to reporters, skewing dialogue to benefit military interests. The past interference of the CIA in the media, especially "Operation Mockingbird" during the Cold War, has drawn concerns about the Agency's attempts to manipulate both foreign and domestic media. The operation claims to have been ‘officially lifted’, but there are still legitimate fears of lingering influence, particularly with cases of CIA agents disguising themselves as journalists. 

Axios, BuzzFeed, HuffPost, The Daily Caller, The Blaze, The Intercept, Vice News, The Hill, Salon, Media Matters for America, Mother Jones, The Root, New York Magazine, The Guardian, Raw Story, Talking Points Memo, Slate, Crooks and Liars, The Nation, The Young Turks, Democracy Now, ThinkProgress, Alternet, Truthout, The Daily Beast, The Washington Examiner, The Federalist, The Progressive, The Independent – they are all doing the CIA’s bidding.

Government-sponsored non-governmental organizations (Think Tank NGOs, i.e., The Ford Foundation, Packard, Trilateral Commission, Ms. Magazine, ), such as the State Department and the CIA as “sponsors”, also exert influence over media coverage. These NGOs may provide news channels with expert commentary and opinion, but they receive their funds non-transparently, thus infusing biases in reporting. News channels have many guest panels that comprise think tank members and NGOs, but due to a lack of full disclosure about their fiscal sponsorship, their interests can remain conflicted.

Media conglomerates reliant on advertising wealth have pressures to steer clear of reporting issues that could alienate advertisers, thus generating further conflicts of interest. Decision-makers within these media monoliths regularly give political donations, which can taint political reportage's objectivity. Although the FCC does possess legislation crafted to prevent runaway concentration of media ownership and ensure equitable broadcasting, enforcement and interpretation remain contentious.

Media ownership concentration, government control, NGO sponsorship, and reliance on advertisement revenue all present blatant biases in media reporting. These factors make it difficult to seek independent, objective reporting, raising fundamental questions about news coverage credibility in contemporary media.

Alongside the Ford and Packard Foundations, the Trilateral Commission, and Ms. Magazine, other names that come up in similar discussions are the Rockefeller Foundation, which has been accused of guiding global health and agriculture policies to American interests. The Carnegie Endowment for International Peace is has also been connected to the United States foreign policy, especially its liberal democratic propaganda during the Cold War. The National Endowment for Democracy (NED) has been labeled as a CIA front for instigating coup d’états and democratic changes in other countries. 

Open Society Foundations by George Soros is also claimed to fund CIA/State Department Projects that go in line with his claimed objectives. International Republican Institute (IRI) and National Democratic Institute (NDI) are also marked as co-spenders by the US government. Both have faced a lot of criticism for trying to spread ‘democracy’ in countries where the U. S. has major geopolitical interests. MacArthur Foundation has been said to finance the non-conservative agenda in politics and the affairs of other countries which is quite contrary to the position of the United States in human rights and democracy promotion.

Cable News in 2025: The Rise of Fear-Based Entertainment on FOX, CNN, and MSNBC

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